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Reality Check
6 Lessons I’ve Learned
When I was in graduate school, and was doing one of my unpaid practicums at Northern Illinois University’s Counseling Services, I had a conversation one afternoon with a wise colleague, an older gentleman who looked like Chester Cheetah but strutted like Miles Davis.
I was discussing with him how overwhelming training in therapy could be, considering the nature of the work we do and the trust that our clients so generously bestow upon us in regards to their life struggles. He told me something I’ll never forget, and that always rings true in my current work: My clients are my best teachers. They’ll let me know when I’m not on top of my game, when I am on top of my game, and when my jokes need to be updated. Well, he didn’t tell me that last part, though I have come to that conclusion.
With that in mind, here are several of the most important lessons I’ve learned from sharing in the struggles of many wonderful and varied clients, of all ages and races and economic backgrounds.
- It doesn’t matter what you’ve done, or how much education you have. It doesn’t matter how smart you think you are, either. What matters is this: Can you add value to the lives of others?
- The hardest part of clinical work is saying goodbye to someone you’ve helped to turn their life around. Nobody teaches you how you do this gracefully in graduate school.
- A great lesson in life is that we all need to learn how to become our own parents, whereby we can self-monitor and regulate in response to life’s stressors.
- The single greatest part of clinical work is the fact that sometimes I’m one of only a few people in the audience for these great one-person feats of bravery and courage that my clients are engaging in.
- We are of no assistance to others when we fail to take care of our own issues.
- There is great power in counting your blessings as a start to building a more confident life.
Leif Smith, Psy.D., President of Personal Best Consulting, LLC, has worked with athletes and coaches from The University of Iowa, The Ohio State University, and the College of Wooster. He specializes in improving performance and production, and has also worked with corporations such as America Online. Subscribe to the free monthly email newsletter, "Personal Bests: Techniques for Living an Extraordinary Life" when visiting his Web site at www.personalbestconsulting.com
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